NFL Player Denies Sex Abuse Charges By Saying, ‘I Don’t Even Like Black Girls’

Washington D.C. (HAHAJK) – This is crazy! A NFL player involved in a sex scandal?! What is our world coming to?!!

NFL player Albert Haynesworth of the Washington Redskins is a bad boy…a very bad boy. Not only was he arraigned yesterday morning for allegedly manhandling a waitress last February at the W Hotel in Washington D.C., but his apparent defense against the charges is pretty unbelievable. Haynesworth reasons he can’t possibly be guilty, because he “doesn’t even like black girls.”

Big Money Hayesworth doesn't like black girls just has he doesn't like working for his multi-million dollar contract.

That sounds like an open and shut case to us.

According to The Root, Haynesworth maintains his innocence and refused to accept a plea deal for simple assault, which would have kept him out of jail.

He opted to be arraigned on sex abuse charges for allegedly “sliding his credit card into the bra of a waitress and touching her breast during a birthday party” and may face up to 180 days in jail if convicted.

Here is Haynesworth’s defense from his mouth to your ears, or eyes… you can read it out loud if that makes you happy:

“I didn’t touch her. I don’t even like black girls. I know what this is about; she is just upset I have a white girlfriend. I couldn’t tell you the last time I dated a black girl. She was trying to get with me,” Haynesworth said.

Realizing the stupidity of his client’s defense, Haynesworth’s business manager, told reporters that the “real” reason the waitress filed charges against his client was because she was upset over her tip.

The waitress told reporters, “No, I’m pretty sure he grabbed me and used my tits as a credit card machine.”